Post your thoughts on movies you've seen recently. Or not recently. I'm not a cop.
I was talking to my brother about Kickass 2 and he thought it was bizarre that no one thought to bring a gun to a literal knife fight when the wannabe heroes and wannabe villains clashed, considering that earlier, they shot up a funeral.
I told him that plot hole would be easy AF to patch with just a couple of short lines. The head villain doesn't want guns because he's going for comic vibes and the Rule of Cool (plus, he might secretly fear getting shot by one of his many mooks). The heroes can't bring guns because the cops are cracking down on vigilantism, so walking around while packing is a fast way to get arrested. Plus, guns clash with the whole superhero vibe and they'd reasonably fear someone getting shot in the crossfire. Each side could have a simple, 5 second scene where someone tries to bring a gun and they say no for whatever reason. Easy peasy.
Movie Reviews
Re: Movie Reviews
So I watched The Odyssey and talked about it with a guy named Troy, so that was funny.
It's a looooong movie, but good.
I'm just going to get this out of the way, I still don't like the drab, all-black armor for the Greeks and the somehow even worse white armor for the Trojans. It's noticeably flimsy, too - I saw the faceplate bend like styrofoam during combat which was like in Star Wars seeing that stormtrooper bang his head on the doorframe.
That said, the historical inaccuracies were somewhat oversold to me - the core story is intact, adding to it in places (though of course, much of it is cut for time) In true Nolan fashion, this movie happens non-linearly, so it jumps around a lot in time. If you've seen Westworld, you already know all about it.
The perils that Odysseus and crew encounter are just as terrifying as I pictured. They're all really dangerous, but my personal favorite is the island with armored giants. You see those guys and you run like Robert Carlyle in the opening of 28 Weeks Later. Don't try anything heroic or clever, just gtfo as fast as you possibly can.
I really liked Himesh Patel as Eurylochus, Odysseus' second-in-command.
One thing I wanted to discuss with you guys is someone telling me he didn't want to be spoiled. This is one of the most famous stories in the entire world and he didn't want me to spoil it.
I told him that I didn't know if it'd be possible for me to spoil it, given its popularity. Practically everyone has to read it in middle school, or so I thought. Then someone else chimed in that it wasn't required reading for them and that they had never read it. I was tempted to say something unkind, but stopped myself.
So I ask you guys, did you grow up learning classical stories like this? Because my education was definitely full of the classics. I want to say that nearly every American is taught the following stories:
* the Bible (especially Adam and Eve, Cain and Abel, Noah, David VS Goliath, Moses parting the Red Sea, Jesus' birth/nativity, Jesus' betrayal by Judas and crucifixion)
* Greek mythology is a little hazier, but I would assume people would at least know the broad strokes: Prometheus (stole fire, gave it to humans, liver eaten every day), the story of Icarus, Sisyphus (most people might not know why he was punished, but they'd at least know that he futilely tries to roll a boulder up a hill), Pandora's Box (knowing that she released calamity, possibly but unlikely to know that she also released hope), Hercules (maybe not knowing why he went on his Labors, but at least knowing that he fought monsters, especially the famous Hydra. I might be biased here), Jason and the Argonauts (especially the Golden Fleece), Hades and Persephone (he takes her down to hades every winter, so that's why everything appears dead during the winter)
* King Arthur and Merlin, especially the quest for the holy grail
* Shakespeare, especially Romeo and Juliet, Hamlet, MacBeth
* The story of Beowulf
* Norse mythology - I don't expect much here, but at least a passing familiarity with Thor (strong, wields his famous hammer), Loki (sneaky), and Odin (traded an eye for wisdom). Also, the concepts of Valhalla and Ragnarok.
Did I get this wrong? Is your own experience different from the above?
It's a looooong movie, but good.
I'm just going to get this out of the way, I still don't like the drab, all-black armor for the Greeks and the somehow even worse white armor for the Trojans. It's noticeably flimsy, too - I saw the faceplate bend like styrofoam during combat which was like in Star Wars seeing that stormtrooper bang his head on the doorframe.
That said, the historical inaccuracies were somewhat oversold to me - the core story is intact, adding to it in places (though of course, much of it is cut for time) In true Nolan fashion, this movie happens non-linearly, so it jumps around a lot in time. If you've seen Westworld, you already know all about it.
The perils that Odysseus and crew encounter are just as terrifying as I pictured. They're all really dangerous, but my personal favorite is the island with armored giants. You see those guys and you run like Robert Carlyle in the opening of 28 Weeks Later. Don't try anything heroic or clever, just gtfo as fast as you possibly can.
I really liked Himesh Patel as Eurylochus, Odysseus' second-in-command.
One thing I wanted to discuss with you guys is someone telling me he didn't want to be spoiled. This is one of the most famous stories in the entire world and he didn't want me to spoil it.
I told him that I didn't know if it'd be possible for me to spoil it, given its popularity. Practically everyone has to read it in middle school, or so I thought. Then someone else chimed in that it wasn't required reading for them and that they had never read it. I was tempted to say something unkind, but stopped myself.
So I ask you guys, did you grow up learning classical stories like this? Because my education was definitely full of the classics. I want to say that nearly every American is taught the following stories:
* the Bible (especially Adam and Eve, Cain and Abel, Noah, David VS Goliath, Moses parting the Red Sea, Jesus' birth/nativity, Jesus' betrayal by Judas and crucifixion)
* Greek mythology is a little hazier, but I would assume people would at least know the broad strokes: Prometheus (stole fire, gave it to humans, liver eaten every day), the story of Icarus, Sisyphus (most people might not know why he was punished, but they'd at least know that he futilely tries to roll a boulder up a hill), Pandora's Box (knowing that she released calamity, possibly but unlikely to know that she also released hope), Hercules (maybe not knowing why he went on his Labors, but at least knowing that he fought monsters, especially the famous Hydra. I might be biased here), Jason and the Argonauts (especially the Golden Fleece), Hades and Persephone (he takes her down to hades every winter, so that's why everything appears dead during the winter)
* King Arthur and Merlin, especially the quest for the holy grail
* Shakespeare, especially Romeo and Juliet, Hamlet, MacBeth
* The story of Beowulf
* Norse mythology - I don't expect much here, but at least a passing familiarity with Thor (strong, wields his famous hammer), Loki (sneaky), and Odin (traded an eye for wisdom). Also, the concepts of Valhalla and Ragnarok.
Did I get this wrong? Is your own experience different from the above?
Re: Movie Reviews
My fiance takes me to movies. Sometimes, they're amazing. Sometimes, they're not so good. Today was definitely the latter.
The End of Oak Street is a mediocre, borderline bad movie. Basically, it's The Mist with dinosaurs instead of cool eldritch monsters. The pitch is entirely this: 80s suburban neighborhood dropped into the late Jurassic. Welcome to the Jungle.
It's fun for about 30 minutes, but it quickly becomes tiresome. For starters, the characters have no peripheral vision. The amount of times there's movement in the distance that goes completely undetected is truly something to behold (or I guess not behold). A giant snake enters the house and I swear, slithers around for a full minute before anyone says a word. And one character sees it and doesn't say anything for reasons that mystify me (I guess he wanted to sneak attack it with a shortbow at point blank range. The weapon selection in this movie is just sooo bad you guys) So many deaths due to people just being completely stupid, which I would ordinarily oppose, but *gestures broadly at real life* I suppose that's now a bit of a truth-in-television.
The dinos at least look cool for the most part, ranging from feathered emu-like Coelophysis (think man-sized raptor, though the real thing was smaller) to Allosaurus to a big ol' salamander and even an impossibly large snake-like critter.
For unclear reasons, none of the critters are in any way dissuaded by severe, possibly fatal injuries. Also, none of the people know how to make spears or use torches. Granted, they do use a shotgun with fairly decent accuracy but sadly not doing a whole lot of damage and a sledgehammer - a hell of a choice, because you're either doing heavy damage or you're whiffing and you're dino chow half a second later - definitely a high risk weapon. I can't say I have something better on me, but if I could search the neighborhood, I'd definitely opt for a machete or shovel or crowbar or metal digging bar (basically a solid metal spear).
The main problem with this movie is that the characters are atrocious. I don't know anyone's names nor do I care about them. In fact, a couple of them are plain unlikable. The only good character is the Carl Sagan fangirl but guess what, none of that is relevant to the plot, although it absolutely should be, since some sort of astronomic anomaly is what sends them to The Land of the Lost. I guess the writer just needed a character to tell the other characters that and so she just reads Carl Sagan then the script, tells everyone, and that's that.
And the other very serious flaw in this movie is that it has nothing to say. No real character development, no great epiphany about life, just "that was scary, I guess I love my family and life now" which is just the most generic thing ever. I half expected some sort of twist, but nothing happened.
Don't get me wrong, this is a halfway decent Outer Limits episode, though it would need to be polished a bit more and have more of an emotional impact to make the final cut. It's not a bad movie, it's just so basic and unremarkable. It just needs some sort of rewrite or stronger dramatic moments or something. Because as it is now, it's something the Bob's Burgers kids would write.
The End of Oak Street is a mediocre, borderline bad movie. Basically, it's The Mist with dinosaurs instead of cool eldritch monsters. The pitch is entirely this: 80s suburban neighborhood dropped into the late Jurassic. Welcome to the Jungle.
It's fun for about 30 minutes, but it quickly becomes tiresome. For starters, the characters have no peripheral vision. The amount of times there's movement in the distance that goes completely undetected is truly something to behold (or I guess not behold). A giant snake enters the house and I swear, slithers around for a full minute before anyone says a word. And one character sees it and doesn't say anything for reasons that mystify me (I guess he wanted to sneak attack it with a shortbow at point blank range. The weapon selection in this movie is just sooo bad you guys) So many deaths due to people just being completely stupid, which I would ordinarily oppose, but *gestures broadly at real life* I suppose that's now a bit of a truth-in-television.
The dinos at least look cool for the most part, ranging from feathered emu-like Coelophysis (think man-sized raptor, though the real thing was smaller) to Allosaurus to a big ol' salamander and even an impossibly large snake-like critter.
For unclear reasons, none of the critters are in any way dissuaded by severe, possibly fatal injuries. Also, none of the people know how to make spears or use torches. Granted, they do use a shotgun with fairly decent accuracy but sadly not doing a whole lot of damage and a sledgehammer - a hell of a choice, because you're either doing heavy damage or you're whiffing and you're dino chow half a second later - definitely a high risk weapon. I can't say I have something better on me, but if I could search the neighborhood, I'd definitely opt for a machete or shovel or crowbar or metal digging bar (basically a solid metal spear).
The main problem with this movie is that the characters are atrocious. I don't know anyone's names nor do I care about them. In fact, a couple of them are plain unlikable. The only good character is the Carl Sagan fangirl but guess what, none of that is relevant to the plot, although it absolutely should be, since some sort of astronomic anomaly is what sends them to The Land of the Lost. I guess the writer just needed a character to tell the other characters that and so she just reads Carl Sagan then the script, tells everyone, and that's that.
And the other very serious flaw in this movie is that it has nothing to say. No real character development, no great epiphany about life, just "that was scary, I guess I love my family and life now" which is just the most generic thing ever. I half expected some sort of twist, but nothing happened.
Don't get me wrong, this is a halfway decent Outer Limits episode, though it would need to be polished a bit more and have more of an emotional impact to make the final cut. It's not a bad movie, it's just so basic and unremarkable. It just needs some sort of rewrite or stronger dramatic moments or something. Because as it is now, it's something the Bob's Burgers kids would write.
Re: Movie Reviews
I lost all interest in the movie when THIS was how they chose to promote it.
Re: Movie Reviews
The dog was actually the most likable character after the science nerd. Both the husband and wife were horrible people in different ways. The husband and wife in 28 Weeks Later had more chemistry lol
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theantithesis
- Empirical Explorer
- Posts: 126
- Joined: Wed Mar 04, 2026 5:06 am
Re: Movie Reviews
I finally got around to watching Madame Web. I've been slightly curious about the Sony Spider-man super villain series, but not enough to watch any of them until now.
Truth be told, I dislike Venom. I don't even care if they made him a compelling character in the comic. If I were to write and essay about everything wrong with comics in the 90's, it would just be a picture of Venom. And maybe a Liefeld panel where he hides the feet.
Kraven is often cited as the worst, but that may be more recency bias. Honestly, I as marginally hopeful about that one. Anyone who wasn't hadn't read Kraven's Last Hunt from the comics. Dark Knight Returns and Watchmen are ground zero for the whole super hero comics as art or whatever, but KLH was part of the ongoing series, not some special limited series not set in the main continuity. Those mini-series shoed that comics could be well-written and KLH confirmed it. And then the 90's happened and everything got, well
This made it a toss up between Morbius and Madame Web. Morbius had been memed to death and tricking Sony into re-releasing it so it could flop again was beautiful. Frankly, I could and may yet watch both, but I ultimately decided on Madame Web as it tend to rate at the bottom of this particular turd pile and I watch a podcast with Brad Sanderson and Brad Wells, whoever they are.
So, what did I think of the movie? Garbage. I don't know if it's interesting garbage. It's interesting until you learn that many of those involved were tricked into thinking this as a real Marvel movie, when it isn't and that part of the deal with Marvel means Sony can't have Spider-man or Peter Parker in their movies. But the plot of original involved Ezekiel Sims attempting to kill Peter Parker, like it's the Terminator. Marvel nixed this and Sony had to re-edit the movie after it was done. Hence the huge amount of ADR to change the motivation of the villain at the last minute.
All of that is more interesting that the actual movie where the target are three teenaged girls ho will someday get spider powers and Cassie Webb needs to protect them while figuring out why she suddenly has the ability to see the future sometimes and deal with that on top of teenaged girls with no sense of self-preservation.
Ultimately, it wasn't much of anything. I don't know these characters. I don't care about these characters. I want to go home.
Truth be told, I dislike Venom. I don't even care if they made him a compelling character in the comic. If I were to write and essay about everything wrong with comics in the 90's, it would just be a picture of Venom. And maybe a Liefeld panel where he hides the feet.
Kraven is often cited as the worst, but that may be more recency bias. Honestly, I as marginally hopeful about that one. Anyone who wasn't hadn't read Kraven's Last Hunt from the comics. Dark Knight Returns and Watchmen are ground zero for the whole super hero comics as art or whatever, but KLH was part of the ongoing series, not some special limited series not set in the main continuity. Those mini-series shoed that comics could be well-written and KLH confirmed it. And then the 90's happened and everything got, well
This made it a toss up between Morbius and Madame Web. Morbius had been memed to death and tricking Sony into re-releasing it so it could flop again was beautiful. Frankly, I could and may yet watch both, but I ultimately decided on Madame Web as it tend to rate at the bottom of this particular turd pile and I watch a podcast with Brad Sanderson and Brad Wells, whoever they are.
So, what did I think of the movie? Garbage. I don't know if it's interesting garbage. It's interesting until you learn that many of those involved were tricked into thinking this as a real Marvel movie, when it isn't and that part of the deal with Marvel means Sony can't have Spider-man or Peter Parker in their movies. But the plot of original involved Ezekiel Sims attempting to kill Peter Parker, like it's the Terminator. Marvel nixed this and Sony had to re-edit the movie after it was done. Hence the huge amount of ADR to change the motivation of the villain at the last minute.
All of that is more interesting that the actual movie where the target are three teenaged girls ho will someday get spider powers and Cassie Webb needs to protect them while figuring out why she suddenly has the ability to see the future sometimes and deal with that on top of teenaged girls with no sense of self-preservation.
Ultimately, it wasn't much of anything. I don't know these characters. I don't care about these characters. I want to go home.
Re: Movie Reviews
I've never seen the Spider-Manless Spider-Man movies, and I don't plan to. I do, however, enjoy the How It Should Have Ended videos about them.
Re: Movie Reviews
Same. Spider-Man but more muscled and kind of a prick doesn't by itself a compelling villain make. I kinda like my villains as the antithesis of the hero's values - not just a physical threat, but an ideological one as well. Batman VS the Joker. Luke Skywalker VS the Emperor. Professor X vs Magneto. Venom doesn't really strike me as the ideological opposite of Spider-Man.theantithesis wrote: Sat Aug 15, 2026 1:30 amTruth be told, I dislike Venom. I don't even care if they made him a compelling character in the comic. If I were to write and essay about everything wrong with comics in the 90's, it would just be a picture of Venom.
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theantithesis
- Empirical Explorer
- Posts: 126
- Joined: Wed Mar 04, 2026 5:06 am
Re: Movie Reviews
The ideological opposite of Spider-man is Paste Pot Pete.